Saturday, August 30, 2008


I can't vote for a guy who wears the wrong t-shirt. Give me the guy who will cost America hundreds of billions of dollars and thousands of lives in unnecessary wars.

QUESTION: Who would make the better president? The Republicans are putting up Arizona Senator John McCain, 72 years young. McCain got into the Naval Academy as the son of an admiral, came close to being expelled for his misconduct, graduated 894th in a class of 899, went on to become a naval aviator, was shot down in Vietnam, and spent over five years in captivity in North Vietnam, enduring harsh treatment, including torture (what Dick Cheney would describe as "enhanced interrogation techniques.")

But other than ditching his first wife, Carol Shepp, who had stood by him during his years in captivity, and their three kids (they refused to talk to him for years) and marrying a blonde, drug addicted beer distributorship heiress with millions of dollars (but who stole drugs from her charity!) with whom he had an affair while his wife was recovering in a hospital bed, what has John McCain actually accomplished in the last 35 years since he returned from North Vietnam? Well, for one, in 1987 he was one of the “Keating Five,” a bi-partisan group of senators whom Charles Keating, who owned Lincoln Savings and Loan, bribed in an attempt to block unfavorable legislation ($112,000 to McCain alone) and to get favorable treatment from bank inspectors while his industry was going down in flames in the S & L scandal. McCain managed to avoid getting booted out of the Senate, although he was rebuked for exercising "poor judgment."

Here is what William Black, Ronald Reagan's Deputy Director of the Federal Savings and Loan Insurance Corp., had to say about his meeting with McCain and four other Senators:

"The Senate is a really small club, like the cliche goes. And you really did have one-twentieth of the Senate in one room, called by one guy, who was the biggest crook in the S&L debacle."

The other choice is some guy from Illinois, via Kansas, Hawaii, and Harvard Law School, named Barack Hussein Obama. Hmmmm. Middle name is “Hussein.” That must mean he’s an Islamic terrorist who wants to secretly pretend to be a devout Christian so that he can subvert America and turn us all into Jihadists who revere the Prophet Mohammed and pray towards Mecca seven times a day. Harvard Law? The guy must be an intellectual who cares about elitist claptrap such as facts, logic, and rational thinking. No way I want a guy like that around the button that can send off a nuclear weapon. Nope, give me a George W. Bush clone who scorns rational thought and who likes mindless, stupid answers to complicated questions: gas prices too high? “Drill here, drill now” is Mr. McCain’s answer! Give me a guy whose first answer- only answer- to any foreign threat is to bomb, kill, or bludgeon. Iran wants to build nukes? Bomb them. North Korea wants nukes? Kill them. Russia invades Georgia? Send the Alabama National Guard into Atlanta and knock those suckers on their butts. Ohhhh, that Georgia. Never mind.

Obama? No way. For goodness sakes, his minister and his wife hate America. He won't wear a flag pin in his lapel (he said it was hypocritical pandering). He was given a Marine Corps t-shirt by a former Marine and he wore it to play basketball against Marines when he wasn't even in the Marine Corps, ever! What a slap in the face to Marines everywhere! No way I can vote for that guy. Far better to vote Republican and continue to let industry lobbyists run FEMA, the EPA, the FDA, the Mine Safety Administration, and the Energy Department (brought to you by ENRON and EXXON during the Cheney Administration) than to put up with a guy who wears the wrong t-shirt.

Nope. No way no how do I want an intelligent, rational, calm, compassionate human being in the White House. Give me a guy who has simple answers or no answers to every serious problem facing America. So, your wife’s got cancer, your kid is autistic, your mother in law just moved in with you because she’s too poor for the nursing home and too rich for Medicaid? John McCain has the answer: the current system is fine and dandy, with one exception: we need to give rich people more tax deductions in the form of “medical savings accounts.” (You know, those 401 K type plans that most minimum wage people working at McDonalds pour their thousands of dollars into when they’re not buying that second beach house down in Panama City).

Clinton’s $100+ billion surplus, which was projected to rise to the point that it would have paid off the national debt in about 15 years, has turned into annual deficits of $400 billion or more and the debt has gone up over $3 trillion since our last Democratic President. McCain thinks that’s ok, even though we have to borrow billions from China to pay to Saudi Arabia for oil, and that money is being funneled to terrorists who want to kill us. McCain’s answer to the enormous debt? Make those Bush tax cuts for billionaires permanent so we’ll never have to worry about paying down our debts.

Iraq is a quagmire and we’re wasting $100 billion a year while our most talented servicemen and women are coming home in body bags, mutilated, missing limbs, or with brain injuries or post traumatic stress disorder from bomb blasts? Don't think about it- because "the surge" worked! And by "worked" McCain means we have to stay there for decades, sacrificing blood, money, and international goodwill until we achieve "victory," which can't be defined because we're not actually fighting a war- it's a military occupation among people who are killing each other.

But the surge worked! Don't even think about the fact that had America listened to Barack Obama in 2002 (he opposed the war and said we’d be in a quagmire in Iraq) and not John McCain (war? hell yes!) , we’d never have been in Iraq, wouldn’t have needed a surge, and 4,150 American servicemen would be alive. America doesn’t need that kind of cool, detached rational judgment and intelligent prognostication in the White House. Nope, give us the dumb guy to whom every problem looks like a nail waiting for a sledgehammer. Give me the guy about whom Mississippi Republican Senator Thad Cochran said:

"He is erratic. He is hotheaded. He loses his temper and he worries me."

So heck yes, vote for John McCain. Because a 72 year old man who can’t remember the difference between Shia and Sunni, who says Al Qaida (they’re Sunni) trains in Iran (they’re Shia and mortal enemies) until Joe Lieberman leans over and corrects him, who talks about problems on the “Pakistan- Iraq border” (sorry, John but Iran and much of Afghanistan are in between), who says his staff will have to answer the question as to how many homes he owns, who was against torture and religious intolerance until he sniffed the presidency, who opposed giving increased veterans benefits to Iraq combat veterans because he wanted life to be so bad if they left the military that they would have to stay in, whose every answer to every question is more of the same policies we’ve had the last 8 years- yeah, that’s the guy to run the country. Not a guy who wants to use his brain, who wants to end the war and help its veterans, who wants people to be able to keep their jobs or get new jobs, who wants to extend health insurance coverage to millions of uninsured, who wants us to return to the rule of law and have justice dispensed to all equally and impartially, who wants America to be respected and liked abroad so they won’t want to kill us.

Naw. Not that guy.


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